We are so Fragile, and Our Fragile Bones Make Noise, we are Just Breakable Girls and Boys.

       Good evening friends and followers. In previous blog posts I have  covered the subjects of love and boys and etc. Today I received a comment from a reader who is going through a breakup and they asked me …

4 thoughts on “We are so Fragile, and Our Fragile Bones Make Noise, we are Just Breakable Girls and Boys.

  1. Thank you so much you are so right about the importance of growth after any break up. And they really are all truly hard. Do you think things would have been different had you stayed with the nice guy?

    You touch on the fact of never having communication with your exes and how that makes break ups easier. I know people that are still friends with their exes without consequence. Was it the seriousness of each relationship that made you never speak to either of them again ?

    Sorry for all the questions I just love your outlook and views.

  2. Thank you for your feedback. Do I think things would have been different if I stayed with the nice guy? Definitely. I probably wouldn’t have been emotionally or physically abused. But would I have been happy? Probably not. These are the sacrifices we make when it comes to love and relationships. I spent almost two years in a relationship with someone I didn’t love and it turned me into someone I hated, I felt I wasn’t living the life I wanted, I was living the life I thought I was supposed to live. However toxic and volitile my relationship with Charlie was it was still filled with so much passion and love and the experience I gained from it is irreplaceable. Now I know how I deserve to be treated and I know that no matter how much people love each other it’s not always enough. It takes so much more for relationships to work than just loving eachother.

    As for the communication thing, I think it is a very naive and juvenile idea to think staying friends with your ex is appropriate. First of all I always have a vast amount of friends, male and female, so the loss of one isn’t going to make a huge dent. But I have plenty of guys that I have dated that I am still friends with and talk to on a regular basis however they were my friends first and we usually gave dating a shot because we confused our chemistry as friends for relationship material. So in the end the breakup was a mutual casual end and we were able to maintain our bond as friends without any awkwardness (besides the fact that we have seen eachother naked). But when you are in a serious relationship and in love and it ends there is just no way to come back from that and act like everything is fine. Also when you do move on and get another relationship how do you explain that friendship to your new bf/gf? That is bound to cause tension and jealousy and it is just something that should be avoided. Hope this answers your questions.
    Xoxo

  3. Sorry for going back to such a late post I just sat here and read them all. I’m in a similar situation that you described in the comment above and in a couple of your stories. I’m with the sweetest guy but I am just so unsure it’s for me. How did you know or what were the signs? I’m scared to end it because he is such a sweet fella, but stringing somebody along is never the answer. It’s been 2 years and I think I need a little edge in my life, I’m 26 I can’t be stuck!

    Please help thank you!

    1. Well I am so flattered that you have read all of my posts it really makes what I do so worth while. The entire purpose of this is for my readers to see themselves in the posts and relate to the situations in hopes to get some help in their own personal lives. I am sorry you seem to be stuck in this “rut” with your relationship. The nice guy I dated was for almost two years so I know what you are going through. The advice I can give you is if you’re feeling this now the best thing you can do is end it. Because I started feeling that way months before I broke it off and I was afraid to hurt him and in the end I hurt him way more because I didn’t end it rationally. The longer I stuck it out the crazier I went stuck in a life that wasn’t for me and it really gets to you. Relationships ending hurt no matter what but it is better to do it sooner rather than drag it out. Sometimes there is no rhyme or reason, people just grow apart, you’re a different person than you were 2 years ago. As far as needing edge in your life I have plenty of experience there and my advice is to try and seek someone who maybe has been through some rough shit but got their life together. You don’t want someone who is presently going through shit because then you will have a project and like you said you’re 26 you don’t want to get stuck fixing someone. But someone who has their shit together but came from some dark past will bring you the edginess you desire.

      Hope that helps. Remember how you spend New Years sets the tone for the rest of the year, so make some changes because this is YOUR life, don’t live for anyone else.

      Xoxo.

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